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Staying Single

There have been a lot of cruel jokes and uncalled for remarks made about those referred to as "old maids" and "bachelors". The question I want to deal with is., "Should everyone Marry?" Some would quote isolated Scriptures out of context to say all should marry. However, there are Scriptures to prove otherwise.

In Matthew 19:3-12, the Pharisees ask Jesus a question about divorce trying to tempt Him. He gives a direct answer which they could have accepted and the conversation would be over. He answers the second question and they say in v 10. "If the case of a man be so with his wife, it is not good to marry." Then in verse 11 & 12 He responds, "All men cannot receive this saying, save they to whom it is given. For there are some eunuchs, which were so born from their mother's womb: and there are some eunuchs, which were made eunuchs of men: and there be eunuchs, which have made themselves eunuchs for the Kingdom of heaven's sake. He that is able to receive it, let him receive it."

"Eunuch" figuratively here means to remain unmarried. That can be seen in the words of Jesus, "which have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven's sake." v12. It can easily be seen that Jesus is not addressing the subject of castration here. He answers their question: "better not to marry?"

1 Tim 5:14, "I will therefore that the younger women marry, bear children, guide the house, give none occasion to the adversary to speak reproachfully." This certainly doesn't teach that all young women have to marry. If one insists that it does, then they must also insist that she bear children, which all cannot do.

1 Corinthians 7 also deals with various subjects concerning marriage/divorce. Please read the whole chapter but notice especially v2, 7-9, 25-40.

Please refer back to Part 1 where I showed how the Pharisees asked Jesus a question about divorce trying to tempt Him. He answered them and they responded in verse 10 "If the case of a man be so with his wife, it is not good to marry."

I also pointed out 1 Corinthians 7 which deals with various subjects concerning marriage/divorce. Apparently the believers at Corinth were confused about these subjects and according to v1 had asked Paul to instruct them. In that verse, Paul states, "It is not good for a man (single) to touch a woman." Then verse v2 states, "Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, (premarital sex) let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband." Then v3 -6 he deals with the relationship within marriage. In verses 7-9 we read, "For I would that all men were even as I myself (single). But every man hath his own proper gift of God, one after this manner (single), and another after that (married) .I say therefore to the unmarried (not divorced) and widows, It is good for them if they abide even as I." (Paul was single, either never married or widowed). Then in verse 9 he states "But if they cannot contain (sexual drives and desire for companionship), let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn (burn in their desire for a companion)."

The key here is found in verse 7, "But every man hath his own proper gift of God."

What Paul means there is that some men and women are equipped by God to live life without the burning desires that would result in fornication it they remained single.

Hebrews 13:4 states, "Marriage is honorable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongerers and adulterers God will judge."

Please refer back to Part 1 & 2 where I established a groundwork for this subject. Copies will be sent upon request at no cost and your name will not be used for further contact.

I directed attention to 1 Corinthians 7 in Part 1 and suggested reading the whole chapter, especially v1-2, 7-9 and 25-40. I dealt briefly with v 1-7 and showed where Paul is not dealing with the divorce question. He does this in v10-24.

I should point out again that Paul states in v7 of 1 Cor. 7 that . . . "For I would that all men were even as I myself" Then he connects the idea with v8, "I say therefore to the unmarried and widows, It is good for them if they abide even as I." Is Paul divorced, single or widowed? The only fitting answer is single; for he would not wish that all men were widowed or divorced. See v7. Look at verses 25-40 and notice a few things:

  1. v25, "Now concerning virgins...I give my judgment, as one that hath obtained mercy." Paul is single and verse 26 says ,"it is good for the present distress." In other words, considering his ministry and travels the single life is better.
  2. v27 However shows that a married man is "bound" and should not seek to be loosed for the same reason.
  3. v28 & 29 If a man loosed by the death of his mate marries, he has not sinned.( see Rom.7:l-4 ) Also, if a virgin lady marries, she has not sinned and strangely, Paul tells both "Nevertheless such shall have trouble in the flesh." See also vs.29-38 which teaches the same thing.

Would you please notice again 1 Cor.7:7 'But every man hath his proper gift of God,". If you are single and you wish to remain single maintaining your integrity, then you have the proper gift of God. If you are widowed and wish to remain single maintaining your integrity, then you have the proper gift of God. If you have been widowed vs39-40 warns you that care must be taken to make sure that if you marry, you marry a good Christian. I would urge you to look up the verses which speak of widows and see how God takes special care of those who have suffered the death of a mate. God bless you is our prayer! If you have any questions or need help in any way, please call.

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